5 steps toward becoming a SAHM

Sometimes I think of myself as some sort of self-help guru. I don't really know why...no one has ever lauded me for all of my helpful advice, I guess I just get a kick out of offering unsolicited help? Be that as it may, I wanted to share the 5 steps we took in order to transition from two incomes to one so I could be a stay-at-home-mom. Maybe some of you need the advice or maybe some of you are just curious, so here are my tips on how we did it! (this was our success story based on our personal choices for our family - every family's desires and goals are different!)

(for the record - we are firmly in the middle class, maybe even lower middle class. Mark and I did not have high-paying jobs to begin with. We have always been somewhat frugal with our money, but it's not like we were loaded OR spend hours clipping coupons.) 

step one

pay off debt

One of the best things we did was pay off our debt. We did it mostly because we didn't want to have the burden of any debt (other than our mortgage - which we would love to pay off someday), but it was also a good thing to do to get the ball rolling on considering parenthood. I wrote all about our debt story here, so please read it and email me with any questions!

step two

be smart with your purchases

Even before we paid off our debt, we tried to think ahead. My car (that I had planned to drive into the ground) was totaled in an accident about 3 months after we got married and we were forced to replace it. We were caught off guard and didn't have a huge savings account so we took out a loan. We did, however, think of the future and assumed that we would drive the next car into the ground. With that in mind, we researched the highest ranked SUV's on the market and purchased a used KIA so it would be cheap to drive, cheap to fix, safe to drive, and fit a couple car seats. 

 Shortly after buying my car (about 4 months later), we decided to buy a house. We were pre-approved for a decent amount, but ended up buying about 15% below that amount. We didn't want our mortgage to be overbearing; plus, we had other debts at the time. In doing that, we essentially bought our house so that we could afford it even on one income. That was one of the smartest moves we made. 

step three

budget, budget, budget

Shortly after we were married, we set up an account on Mint.com. It was Mark's idea, but it slowly morphed into my territory and now I'm the one that manages it (along with our bank accounts, taxes, and other important things - no pressure). I can't tell you how many times I've changed the filters and budgets on Mint, but it is good because I always know how we spend our money and how to plan for the future. It takes a good 12 months to get your budget in line and I highly encourage signing up just so you can see where your money is going.

step four

live on one income/build up your savings

Our timeline of paying off debt and getting pregnant lined up pretty perfectly. In order to put ourselves to the test and see if the stay-at-home-mom gig was for us, we started living on Mark's income the month after we found out we were pregnant. Our savings was pretty sad looking after we had ignored it during our debt payoff so it felt really good putting my entire paycheck into it. It bulked up quickly and we learned that we could live a little even on just one income. 

step five

research your options

In all of our planning, I had to think about health insurance, ways to cut down on other expenses, and creative ways to bring in a little extra money. I've shared about ebates here (where I've earned more than $300 just by shopping online) and I am always shopping consignment, finding the best deals on everyday expenses (like switching to Gexa Energy - our electric bill was $19 last month), and earning cash back as much as possible (we bank with Chase and have funded vacations using only the cash back from our Freedom card). My etsy shop and this blog bring in a little more money and they also let me take part in creative endeavors that exercise my mind and keep me in touch with the outside world.

.......

We're four months in and life has been pretty good so far. I mean, look how much fun we get to have every day!

Even with some major unexpected expenses and hefty hospital bills, we've stayed firmly above water and I think we both enjoy the benefits of our huge shift in life. If you have any questions about how we got here or what it's like being a stay-at-home-mom, please feel free to email me and I'll get back to you as soon as little bit goes down for a nap! :)

beau andrew | five months

Five months!

The sweet outfit is courtesy of my cousin Anne (much to my mom and sister's delight). Everyone needs a little Feltman Bros. smocking in their life! Monthly stickers are from my sweet Aunt Janet!

Beau is chugging right along at five months old. He is:

-sleeping in this sleepsuit (for the last few nights) and has reverted to doing 8 hour stretches (not complaining, though!) 

-at least 20lbs (no doctor's appointment recently)

-growing...I think he has gotten taller because he seems slimmer (when we all know that isn't true!)

-starting to sit up with assistance...he's so close!

-wearing size 3 diapers and size 3 shoes

-wearing anything between 6-12 months and even some 18 month leggings that were passed down (though all of his pants need to be rolled up)

-rolling over from tummy to back, but can only go left

-learning sign language and already shows excitement when I sign "hungry" and "milk" so I know he is catching on!

-watching 10 minutes or less of Baby Einstein or ASL videos every day. I'm nervous about 'screen time' but he LOVES it and they are really educational.

-sensitive to my mass consumption of chocolate :(

-eating every 3 hours during the day, preferably on the 3, 6, 9 etc schedule because I like to put him to bed at 9. He has tried one tiny finger-tip sized bit of mashed potatoes, but that's it for solids!

-LOVING when Daddy comes home from work. He is his favorite person and has been for the last month or two.

-loving watching Motley and touching her. Motley won't let him get too close, but he has got a feel for her tail a couple of times. 

-jumping in his jumper and sitting in his high chair at least once a day, if not more

-completely into grabbing things and heading for his mouth. He loves hair, necklaces, shirts...anything within reach! Mark and I also both have scars on our faces from where he scratched us (he has an iron grip with his right hand)

-still loving car rides and usually falls asleep. We tried out his new car seat (that I scored a major deal on, of course!) and he loves looking out the window from his new vantage point!

-all about music...any of his musical toys can usually grab his attention

-getting very vocal and making himself known

-looking about 60% like mommy and 40% like daddy these days (according to Mark and I). It's interesting to hear what everyone thinks!

-making diaper changes harder (especially for daddy) because he wiggles and kicks so much!

-just starting to find his feet but hasn't realized their full potential yet

-content to gnaw on his pacis and teethers but most of all, anyone else's hands

-startling at loud screaming and unfamiliar faces when he is woken up

-ticklish on this thighs and sides

-fighting naps but can typically go down in his Mamaroo (LOVING it these days) with mama singing beside it (favorites to go to sleep are "You Are My Sunshine" and the southern 'classic' "You Get A Line, I'll Get A Pole". Mark laughs at the latter!)

game changer.

My life is forever changed.

I've mentioned it quickly before, but today I want to talk about my favorite new thing. I'm serious - this has been a lifesaver. 

Grocery trips have been altered slightly now that I have Beau with me the majority of the time. It's now a 'no-no' to set a car seat on a shopping cart. If I take in my stroller, I'm limited on what I can buy because I can only buy what fits in the small basket in the stroller. If I wear him in the Ergo (that WAS the best way to shop), I have to set my purse in the cart and I'm super paranoid about it getting snatched. Plus, I feel like he is going to topple out whenever I bend over. 

Moms - problem solved. 

WalMart, in competition with Amazon, has started WalMart Grocery Pickup, a simple grocery pickup service to make all of our lives easier. My grocery trips now take a grand total of 5 minutes. I'll tell you why.

...

Before I begin, please note that this post is NOT sponsored by WalMart! I'm seriously just incredibly obsessed with this new service and want to pass on the good news. 

...

Okay, so here's how it works: You go to the WalMart grocery website (or download the app) and create a log in. From there, you just load up your cart. It takes a while to get accustomed to the interface and find your favorite products, but I was pretty comfortable after the first try. (Bonus - instead of making a mental list or jotting down items on a scrap piece of paper, I just add things to my online cart as I think of them. Easy and quick!)

When you're done filling your cart, you pick a time and place to pick up your items. You pay online. When your time slot comes, the store will call you to let you know your order is ready. They ask you to call when you're 10 minutes away and then again when you pull into the designated spaces. I haven't had to wait on them to come out so far! You just park on the left side of the store and they bring out your items and load them up.

I got a welcome gift filled with Starbucks, gluten free treats, and candy the first time I used the service and I got a fun Super Bowl themed gift the second time! They also pass out coupons!

It takes about 5 minutes for them to load up your car (they tell you to take it easy - they'll load that heavy dog food and those cases of water!) and then you're done! No unloading the baby, no finding a parking spot, nothing. Did I mention there were no extra fees to this service? Prices are the same on the items whether you pick them out in the store or if you use the service. Y'all - I sat in line at Chick fil A for three times the amount of time it took me to get my groceries!

I'll admit - I was always a Kroger customer for my groceries and only went to WalMart if it was convenient or if I wanted something specific that they sold. Now, WalMart is the epitome of convenience for me and I'm a loyal customer as long as they keep this service around! I can get my groceries and unload them and put them away at home in way less than an hour. What did I say? Life.changing. 

Anyway, I'm sold. This new service came at the perfect time for me and I'm sure it will be a blessing to lots of other busy and tired moms out there. 

Use my referral link and get $10 off your first order!

weekend recap - the day the girls came to town

We started the weekend with some bedhead and crib shenanigans!

Saturday we worked on our tummy time (guess who's rolling over all.the.time now!?)

My friends Heather and Emily got into town from Houston and we headed up to the square in McKinney to soak in some serious vitamin D (it was 75 degrees all weekend!)

Soaked in sunlight and still this cute. He love his girlfriends!

This face cracks me up. It looks like one of my favorite emojis!

The various floors on the square...

We met back up with the ladies on Sunday for brunch and a little retail therapy. I had to get it all out of my system before my month of no spending and I did just that. My credit card needs a break!

After I sent the girls on their way, Mark and I headed north to a neighborhood near ours. The cutest trails and park run through this neighborhood and they have this cool waterfall that we had discovered last year on a long walk. We took Beau back in our new Ergo360 and brought Motley along as well. 

Beau loved his new ride and I loved my new sunglasses!

It was a great warm weekend and I feel so refreshed! 

no-spend February

This is going to be really tough for me.

I'm going to try to keep my spending in check for the month of February this year. Obviously, our income level has changed and although I'm not an over-spender, I tend to talk myself into buying odds and ends and clothes and food on a regular basis (and I don't really need any of it).

Beau says "Mommy, you can do it."

I can't cut myself off completely but here's what I'm planning to do:

groceries: $200 - I did a big trip (in about 5 minutes - more on that later this week!) last week and got a lot of things to freeze. We usually spend about $400 on groceries but I'm going to try to use what I already have and only spend $200 this month. 

gas: $80 - the price of gas is helping me out on this. It takes about $25 to fill my tank. Between driving Mark to work for the next couple of weeks (we sold his car!!!) and driving to see my family, I am hoping I can make $80 work. 

date nights - I'm allowing us one evening out per week but limiting our spending to $25 each time. That doesn't sound like we are cutting back, but you have to be pretty conservative to go out to eat and spend $25 or less with a ravenous breastfeeding mom in tow! Plus, I think those evenings out are good for our sanity and our relationship. 

eating out during the week - sometimes I just need out of the house and lunchtime is always convenient. I'm allowing myself to eat out one day a week but promise to keep it under $7.

myself (clothes/hair/etc) - I'm going NADA on clothes. I've got enough, I've done enough shopping recently, and if I can't go a month without buying something for myself, something is majorly wrong!

Beau's clothes - Beau also has MORE than enough so I'm going to go cold turkey for him...with the exception of February 27th. Consignment sales are heating up for the spring and that is our first sale to go to. I like to stock up during these sales so that will be my pass to spend on him!

home improvement - this one is tough because I want to spend the time I'm not shopping on improving things around the house. Some of those things will be free, but some will cost money! I'm giving myself $30 to spend here.

I can't think of much else I can limit myself on (the bills have to be paid!) so this is it for now. Please let me know if I've forgotten anything!

Spending less means saving more for our family and it couldn't come at a better time. We just sold Mark's car and are in the market for something else so we'll have to put a little money towards that. We are also constantly trying to increase our savings (for a house, for a trip, for college) and the money we have put towards that greatly decreased since I resigned from my job to watch Beau at home. I'd like to continue growing that!

I'm hoping to use this non-shopping time as time to explore with Beau. We need to get a library membership and learn sign language. The weather has been nice and I'd love to get outside with him more. I have more than a thousand projects I want to work on at home as well as for my Etsy business and I'd love to put some focus into them. Also just generally, I want to get out of the habit of spending and just be content with what I have!

Feel free to join in with me for no-spend February or pass on any tips to keep up my motivation and momentum or just wish me luck!

Happy February! <3

- want - need - wear - read - 2

I'm back again for my version of a Friday post! I explained my thought process last week. Here goes!

want.

I'd love a maid. I know it's kind of my job to clean the house but sometimes it just feels like that's all I do! Has anyone figured out the secret to cleaning and your house actually staying clean for more than one day? 

need. 

To get started on Beau's Canadian citizenship paperwork. Mark is Canadian and for $100 and some paperwork, Beau can become a dual citizen. We think that would be pretty cool for him and might have some benefits, but I just need to get started on it! I'm kind of scared it's going to take forever. Blah!

wear.

please pardon my mess

I wore this crazy outfit on Wednesday. I really like this plaid shirt I got at Gap but it fits really odd...kind of boxy. I still kept it but now I'm struggling with what to wear it with. I've seen people mix leopard and plaid and I DO like it, I just wasn't sure my method was the best looking. Anyway, I liked it well enough in the morning to wear it the rest of the day. I'm pretty sure everyone I came into contact with thought I was a lunatic, though. 

read. 

I needed to cook some chicken last night and as always, I turned to Pinterest for a quick recipe. I was wanting something crispy to go with my mac and cheese (a staple around here) and I ended up liking how easy and not too messy this fried chicken recipe was. I added a packet of Ranch dressing mix and it was nicely seasoned and really tasty!

Happy Friday!